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Showing posts from 2013

Birthday Bliss?

Today is my birthday.  Today, I am 54  years old.  I didn't expect to see this day.  I didn't expect to live this long.  You see, 10 years ago, on my 44th birthday, I was going to end my life.

I was lost. Lost to myself.  Lost to my sense of purpose.  Lost to joy and love and all the things that make a life worthwhile. Lost.  But something else happened.  Something amazing.  Call it an angel. Call it grace. Call is spirit, coincidence, synchronicity.  Call it bullshit.

The universe wasn't through with me and so I didn't die.

The past 10 years have not been easy.  It has not been all roses and sunshine and waking up every day  ready to seize life and live it to the fullest.  Many days were dark and lonely and locked me in some super ninja nasty hold that slapped me around and knocked me on my ass. But I learned from those days.  I am a better me because of them.  And I have more good days than bad days now.

The past 10 years have had loss - death - mourning; of dreams,…