Tuesday, November 10, 2009

What do I do??

So I entered National Novel Writing Month - where you are supposed to create a 175 pg, 50, 000 word novel in the month of November.   I started out pretty good, whipped out my first 1000 words in one evening.  Thought I could probably get there if I spent at least one day a weekend writing.  Sure...no problem.

Well - one small problem.  I'm writing, that's not it.  But the story has no form, no plot, no hook.  It's just words!!  I keep writing...waiting for the inspiration to hit...and people keep telling me that I have to just keep writing and not edit and not worry about the rest.  I'm trying!  Really I am.  But so far it feels pretty much like masturbation.  I do it because I have to.  (I mean, I can't not write - and yes I know that's a double negative - see I can't stop editing even here!) I do it because there is some pleasure in releasing all these ideas that have been banging around in my head.  But in the end I feel pretty empty because it just doesn't feel like the real thing.

Probably more information than you wanted about me.  But it had to be said.

I love writing.  I love the satisfaction of finding just the right word to define the color of the sunrise when I'm waiting for my bus in the wet November morning.  I love the feel of words on my tongue.  I love the release of a perfectly articulated idea and seeing others warm to it. 

Maybe I just haven't found the right...toy...to play with.   And in the meantime, just keep doing it.  Thanks for listening.

1 comment:

Jenn said...

For most of us novice Wrimos 50k words is the most we've ever written in one stretch.
BUT
Not in a lifetime!

There are insanely bad rants of nothing, pages worth of descriptions of the way someone's shirt hangs on their back, the exact same descriptive word in the same sentence 2 or more times (a HUGE pet peeve of mine but one I can not break away from right now because December is for editing!!!) and amazingly bad grammar in my sad excuse for a novel but you know what it all come down to? I'll have 50k or more words that I can remold and shape into anything (or nothing) I want. The beauty will be in reaching the goal.

You can do it KC, just keep writing and even if it doesn't seem like it right now, the muse will find you ♥