Skip to main content

Can I get an Amen?

So far, 2011 has sucked.  I mean really sucked.  I can see the end in sight and I'm encouraged by little indications that things are getting better.  I'm not going to let this get to me either.  Going boldly forward in faith and hope.

January is typically a tough month for me anyway.  I'm the budget coordinator for my division at work and our fiscal years run from July to June.  So January means I have to check where we are for the current year and start projecting for the coming year.  It take a couple of weeks and lots of spreadsheets for me to catch up with everyone, find out what's changed and what's coming down the pike.   The result of my work means that our CTO can make some informed decisions about spending for the current year and make solid predictions of where we need to invest. 

This year, to complicate matters, I came down with a terrible cold.  I'm still coughing a full 4 weeks later.  It's one of those awful coughs that settles right in your chest and you constantly feel like you need to swallow, but you can't because there's nothing there to swallow.  So you start coughing and it feels like your lungs are about to burst out of your body.   Between one thing and another, I missed a few days of work, but mostly I just worked my normal schedule and went home to fall asleep on the couch.  Sleep has been fitful - a few hours at a time with very few full nights of sleep.  I'm looking forward to a real good sleep.

Then there's my car.  I have a 1999 Nissan Sentra XE, black, 5-speed manual transmission.  It has just over 85,000 miles on it and I don't put more than a couple thousand miles on it a year.  I live near my job and walk or use transit most of the time.  On weekends, I run my errands around town.  Occasionally, I'll drive to the coast or out to visit my sister or just go for a drive.  Gas prices have limited my pleasure driving somewhat.  Anyway, my clutch has been making overtures of unhappiness for some time.  I was going to get it looked at as soon as I had gotten my tax refund. But the car had other ideas.  On a rainy Saturday two weeks ago, as I was out doing my errands and grocery shopping, the clutch just gave out.  I managed to baby it home.  I'm fortunate to live across the street from a AAA approved auto shop and I took it to them explaining my financial constraints and concerns.  The new clutch was 600.00.  Just about all the money I had.  The irony is that my registration is due at the end of the month...and I don't have the money to pay it.  So I'll be illegal for a couple of days until my next payday rolls around. 

Today my Facebook account got spammed with a virus.  All day long people have been calling, emailing, texting, letting me know that this has happened and I need to change my passwords right away.  Of course, I've already done that.  What I find frustrating is that anyone would really think the posting is from me.  There's a misspelling in it people!  I may be a little lazy in my grammar from time to time, but spelling??  No way.

But this year is about me taking small, thoughtful steps toward a happier me.  So I'm not letting the universe get me down.  I'm still here.  My friends still love me.  My work is still gratifying.  And my goals are clearer with each passing day. 

I'm going to be healthier, happier, more satisfied spiritually, more creative, more open to love and I'm going back to Paris.  Maybe not this year.  But soon.  And for a real long time.   And you can help me.  One of my goals is to write here at least once a week.  So if you don't hear from me by next Friday, feel free to send me a reminder.  2011, I'm here...and I'm staying. 

Comments

Bridgete said…
Okay, I will make sure you're writing once a week.

My car was illegally driving around for months before I finally could deal with it. You should be fine for a couple days. ♥
Bert said…
I am so glad that you are staying.
Love you KC.
Bert said…
Oh , I forgot ....AMEN !!!!!
Jenn Flynn-Shon said…
A-MEN!

The misspelled word was the reason I knew it wasn't from you! Plus the one on Ginger's page was to Virginia...easy to put those pieces together :-)

A couple days of not being fully legal is nothing, I've gone 2 months before getting a new inspection sticker before. You just have to brush up on your acting skills...

"Ma'am, do you know why I pulled you over?"
"No officer" *blinking innocently*
"Your reg is expired"
"What! Oh my goodness, I must have completely forgot about that when I had them fix the clutch last week, how silly of me! I'll get it in to be updated right away!" *flashing your winning smile*
"Okay ma'am, be sure that you do, this is your verbal warning..."

Popular posts from this blog

The Grapes of ???

I watched the John Ford film of Grapes of Wrath last night. I started out just enjoying Henry Fonda's wonderful performance - so easy and real. But I ended up wondering if our nation really learned anything from the Great Depression. What is the great crime in Grapes of Wrath? It's a crime to be poor. It's a crime to need, to ask, to worry. And it would seem that it is still a crime to be poor. We entered the depression of the 1930s a nation of haves and have nots. Those who had - those in power - scrambled to hang on to their wealth while the have nots scrambled to gather the scraps. And as I look around me today, as I listen to the news, I hear those same echos of those who have grasping for their power while the have nots silently fight to live and make it to the next day. Last night I woke up thinking about the recent discussion of the increase in the minimum wage and what it would mean to businesses and that it would actually cause jobs to be lost. It sounded ...

Random Thoughts about my Mother

It's been a very hectic month for me.  I got very sick right after Thanksgiving and was barely able to hold my head up, let alone sit at a computer for long.  Got back to work last week and was good for the work day, but still pretty tired when I got home.  At long last this week, I started to feel like myself.  Then yesterday afternoon, my sister called me.  Our mother has died.  Not unexpected, but still a bit of a blow.  She lived nearly 92 years, her birthday is January 16th.  So in the interest of remembering my mother and returning to regular blogging, I present Random Thoughts about My Mother. Mildred Irene Wallock Watt.  My mother was born in January 1918...just before the end of WWI.  Los Angeles was a different place then, a collection of small towns, some manufacturing, some agriculture, some business.  Her father moved his family there when the film industry was locating there because the sunshine and variety of landsc...

It just sucks...

You want to know what the worst part about moderate to severe depression? (using the clinical diagnosis here) It's knowing when those waves hit you that there is something or someone out there that you let get to you. In my case, it's usually a combination of things. I've got multiple projects coming to deadline at work - stress. I'm not sleeping very well because of allergies. I'm not eating like I should be. I'm getting my exercise - walking, yoga - which is a positive because that's usually the first thing to go. And so I'm vulnerable to those triggers and I know it. I avoid mr. ring on his finger 'cause that will just send me over the edge. But I can't keep him from coming onto my floor and sitting down at the cubicle next to me and talking to someone else. So I put on the headphones and hit play on Itunes and what do I get....love songs. Crap. And even he wouldn't get to me if the really big trigger hadn't been flipped jus...